This week has been a week I really would not like to live again. When Gloria referred to it as the Russian Front, she wasn't far off. Maybe more like Bagdad!!! The stress and tension has not been fun. To top it off we had both the boys try to slit their wrists. Yes, thing are very much out of control. Thankfully both times the injuries were very minor, but the scream was very loud! So, now both the boys are in therapy again. Branden was already. His psychologist jumped right on that point. Billy starts on Tuesday.

We have told our son that he has to stop correcting the boys. It is not his job or his responsibility. I think his heart is in the right spot, but he has no idea how to deal with damaged children. Even if they can be brats!!! He claims that he can not stand it around here with the way the boys don't jump the second they are asked to do something. It is complete disrespect. I even asked him if he remembered when he was this age?Of course his memory is not the same reality I remember. He always did what he was asked!! He moved out to his Dad's place at 15.

Anyway, now you know why I have bee AWOL. Sitting and writing was the last thing on my mind. Ray is gone for the weekend. The change around here was immediate. The boys are so much calmer.

Ray says he is moving very soon. I think it is past that time. He is not following through with getting the medical help he needs for his foot. That was the reason he came. So, he needs to get out on his own again. He got his SSD reinstated so he has income. I could not put him out without that. I love my son, but not under my roof anymore.

Having him here is having "three" disfunctional teenagers in the house. He has another set of baggage that he needs to deal with. Of course if you ask him, he has no problems.

So for the weekend things are good. Ray said he would be back on Monday, but I am not sure for how long. He has his job back aslo. SO???? Find another place to live!!!

We are going to be fine. I promise.
God is in control and things will be good.
Prayers will certainly not hurt.
Granny

Now you have to admit this pup has his problem solved for the time being that is..

All is much better on the Russian Front as Gloria calls it. Much calmer and under control.

Love you all,
Granny

Posted at 9:12PM PDT

The last couple days have been completely from hell. We are being visited by serious problem coming out in Branden. They relate back to many years ago. When will this ever end for him??

He scared G-pa pretty good today. He was going at his wrist with a blade again. Yes, again. Thankfully, there was no real damage, just a scratch. But it is a scream for help. He feels that he is completely negative and there is no way to change. It is so sad!!

I did send a FAX to his psychologist right away. I figured that was the fastest way to get to him. Phone calls always mean, " leave a message". This way he will have it in his hand, and he can call if he needs more information.

After raising so many children, I find it hard that I honestly do not know how to help this young man. I feel that I am loosing him down a big deep hole. I know it is him that has to change and him that needs the help. But, after doing so much for so many years, it is hard. I feel like a failure, but I know I have not.

So again I ask everyone to pray for this family, and for Branden.
There is nothing more powerful.
Love to all
Granny

Posted 10:19PM PDT

Someday when my children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates a parent, I will
tell them, as my Mean Mom told me: I loved you
enough . . to ask where you were going, with whom,
and what time you would be home.

I loved you enough to be silent and let you
discover that your new best friend was a creep.

I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours
while you cleaned your room, a job that should have taken 15
minutes.

I loved you enough to let you see anger,
disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children must
learn that their parents aren't perfect.

I loved you enough to let you assume the
responsibility for your actions even when the
penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart.

But most of all, I loved you enough . .. . to say
NO when I knew you would hate me for it.

Those were the most difficult battles of all. I'm
glad I won them, because in the end you won, too.
And someday when your children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates parents, you will tell them.

Was your Mom mean? I know mine was. We had the
meanest mother in the whole world! While other kids
ate candy for breakfast, we had to have cereal, eggs, and toast.
When others had a Pepsi and a Twinkie for lunch, we had to eat
sandwiches. And you can guess our mother fixed us a dinner that was
different from what other kids had, too.

Mother insisted on knowing where we were at all
times. You'd think we were convicts in a prison. She
had to know who our friends were, and what we were
doing with them. She insisted that if we said we
would be gone for an hour, we would be gone for an hour or less.

We were ashamed to admit it, but she had the nerve
to break the Child Labor Laws by making us work We
had to wash the dishes, make the beds, learn to
cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, empty the trash
and all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she would lie
awake at night thinking of more things for us to do.

She always insisted on us telling the truth, the
whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the time
we were teenagers, she could read our minds and had
eyes in the back of her head. Then, life was really tough!

Mother wouldn't let our friends just honk the horn
when they drove up. They had to come up to the door
so she could meet them. While everyone else could
date when they were 12 or 13, we had to wait until we were 16.

Because of our mother we missed out on lots of
things other kids experienced. None of us have ever
been caught shop lifting, vandalizing other's
property or ever arrested for any crime. It was all her fault.

Now that we have left home, we are all educated,
honest adults. We are doing our best to be mean
parents just like Mom was.

I think that is what's wrong with the world today.
It just doesn't have enough mean moms!

I received this by email today...

An interesting parallel...

I bought a bird feeder. I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed. Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous flow of free and easily accessible food. But then the birds started building nests in the boards of the patio, above the table and next to the barbecue. Then came the bird crap.

It was everywhere: on the patio tile, the chairs, the table...everywhere. Then some of the birds turned mean; they would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket. Other birds were boisterous and loud; they sat on the feeder squawking, screaming, and demanding that I fill it when it got low on food. After a while, I couldn't bear to sit on my own back porch anymore. I finally took down the bird feeder; and in three days, the birds were gone. I cleaned up their mess and took down the many unsightly nests they had built all over the patio. Soon, the back yard was like it used to be...quiet, serene, and no one demanding their rights to a free meal while trashing out my place.

Now lets see...

Our government started giving out free food, subsidized housing, free medical care, and free education with no strings attached. Then the illegal's came by the tens of thousands. Their junky nests and small apartments, each housing 5 families, sprang up everywhere. Then came their crap, their mess, their noise, and the constant squawking and screaming for more free food and free liberties. Suddenly our taxes went up to pay for free services. We started waiting 4 hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor because the room was filled with free medical recipients. Many of our educational systems are beginning to fall behind others because half the students can't speak English. I have to press "1" on the phone just to hear my bank speak to me in English. All the products in my local supermarket are now in bi-lingual containers. There are thousands marching in our streets who carry flags of other nations while demanding more from us.

Hmmmm -

Maybe it's time our government took down the bird feeder?

Granny

Posted 6:58 PDT